I swear I have just gotten more and more shy over the last year or so. Probably the thing I want most right now is to be really confident and never feel anxious or nervous, I'm even shy at my own house. I really want to just start this year all over again and completely change my personality, I wish there was a machine that could do this.

Went op-shopping today with Zea and her japanese student Aiya, who is really nice. I got some shoes and a  dress, oh and a delicious pesto bun with feijoa juice. Iv'e been filming random things on my Lomokino, about to go get movies. I want something exciting to happen, but at the same time I really don't. The Lantern festival is on, I may go there tomorrow night.

Anxiety isn't any fun

Why do I always plan to do so many things in the holidays, but they never happen due to stupid fucking social anxiety. D:< I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate iiiit! I wish I could just not care and actually have fun in awkward situations that occur practically all the fucking time, man I'm angry right now, I got all ready to go to a pool party in Rangiora and got to the bus stop, but something made me turn around and go home...kjtcoijkhgnrcoghj

Blah.

So hot. Made a cake, went op shopping, going to the beach. ;D Work social club tomorrow night, 70's themed... Anything with the word 'social' in it isn't really my thing, awkward small chat. :c But oh well, it should be alright fun. Right now I'm really bored and kind of wish I had school...

Old baby photos.

I love looking at old family albums, so many memories! :3

Blerrgh.

Last day of school for over two months eyifgbwjk yayyyy!! Went to the A&P Show, went on some super exhilarating rides, ate a snow cone, petted some Alpaca's and a Husky, looked at stalls, I had fun! Three exams next week, (dreading) but after that I'm done. I'm pretty glad I passed what I wanted to pass, and learned stuff during the terms. Next year I want to do level three art and design or photographyy, and make a shop selling stuff I make maybe. Moving into my new built sleepout in a week or two, it's so lovely in all it's cuteness! White walls, built in desk and wall to ceiling shelves, retro lights, wooden floor, french doors, nice porch, I can't wait to decorate it with my photos and ornaments. Whoops, longer than I thought... Oh well, needed to write my thinking!

Weekendio

Adam's party, beer, spotlight, dancing, couch, quilt, ipod over the sound of gossiping girls, sleep, chickens, juice, Saab car, Cookie Time Factory, Mc Donalds, driving, Lyttelton, Grandparents, bonsai, records, scrabble, Patti Smith, Grace Jones, fluffy cat, in the middle, milkshake, stay up late, Ferry Mead, home again, one fun weekend, with Francis, Phoebe, Finn, and George. :3

Blah blah

Party time tomorrow night.. It should be a good change, Made some works for folio, but I'm hatin' on it, because it doesn't look the way I intended it to -."-  I'm exited about my sleep-out being finished, the weather warming up, my birthday in 2 weeks ;D I'm dreading practice exams, finishing NCEA stuff, folio due soon, thats all for now.

Same.

I seem to own a lot of clothes that other people have, which is weird because most of my clothing are from op-shops... I have the same brown suede coat as Finn, the same 90's jacket as Robyn, the same grey T-shirt as Bailey. Ahh clothes are just all the same. Today was alright as well, apart from it being a Monday, missing out on a Homebase photo, and the sadness of my rather empty folio panel :c 

Rah.

Blerghhh, I hate that feeling when you're walking around and it feels like you're not 'with it'... Like you can't hear anyone around you, and feel like you can't talk to anyone and you feel faint and everything keeps flashing when you blink D; Then it just ends in extreme tiredness and a pounding headache. This is one of those days.

Anti-Social Weekend.

Yet another weekend spending at home... Not in the mood to be a social creature, (as always) I would much rather go op-shopping by myself and stay in bed watchin' movies!  n.n

Random?

Skipping is good fun! Work after school isn't. -__- I want a bass guitar, they make such a great sound.. I would like to be able to sing.. Or at least play an instrument! I now know all my astrological signs in the different planets :D
Sun in Virgo
Moon in Gemini
Mercury in Libra
Venus in Libra
Mars in Scorpio
Jupiter in Sagittarius
Saturn in Pisces
Neptune in Capricorn
Pluto in Capricorn
Ascendant in Cancer
Midheaven in Taurus.. I really don't know what this means for me, but it is rather interesting all the same!